Have you heard statements such as, “You’ll get it right away!” but waited for hours and finally got what you needed with much follow-up?
Are you disappointed when your friend, spouse, professional contact, boss, or colleague has not lived up to the commitment they had given you?
Do you wonder why people make commitments and then are not committed to them anymore? Why do they love reminders? Do they even understand that they are losing credibility by not living up to their words? Are they serious about their commitments? Do they know how frustrating it is to follow up with someone?
I decided to understand what stops people from being committed to their commitments. Hence, I started engaging with all such people who I found didn’t live up to their commitments. The reasons were intriguing.
The Top Reasons:
- Over commitment: They think they can do it but are not able to prioritize.
- Brownie points: They think they can earn quick brownie points by appearing willing to take on responsibilities.
- Procrastination: They feel they have time at hand and can do it later.
- Lack of accountability: The consequences of not living up to their commitment are not clearly outlined to them.
- Inability to say “No”: They can’t say no to anyone as they feel the person may feel bad.
- Relationships: Their level of commitment is different for each type of relationship.
- Impulsive nature: They commit on impulse and then regret.
- External factors or unforeseen circumstances: They are unable to keep their commitment due to certain situations like a family emergency, or natural calamities like floods, earthquakes, etc.
- Commitment is not one of their Core values.
Why Is Commitment Important?
Let me first help you to understand why living up to a commitment is important. Our behaviour reflects our values. If a person fails to honour commitments, it reflects a lack of values and puts a question mark on their reliability. Reliability is the foundation of credibility. Being committed to what you say also gets you respect.
Commitment is recognized as a strength at it needs hard work and dedication to live up to a commitment. A committed person reflects that they possess the qualities of self-discipline and perseverance. They are willing to stretch to meet goals despite challenges that may crop up. This also leads them to be great leaders.
Having understood the importance of commitment, here are a few tips for all who want to be better at dealing with their commitments.
Tips to be Committed:
Commit to yourself: The first step is to commit to yourself that you will be committed to whatever you said you would do despite all odds. Work on being self-disciplined. Going the extra mile to meet your commitments is a game-changer.
Building credibility requires you to be consistent in delivering promises and high-quality work. It requires you to be ethical and transparent. By being open and truthful to the person you are committing to and living up to it, you will strengthen your position and gain respect, you will improve your credibility.
Learn to Prioritize: One of the most important steps is to prioritize. We must have a realistic estimate of how much time it takes to do a job. This alone will bring great relief to the feeling of being overwhelmed. For estimating time, you need to do it and time yourself. Once you know how much time and effort a particular task requires, you will not burden yourself by making unrealistic commitments.
If the Boss has given many tasks to complete, it would be sensible to check with the Boss itself which one needs to be completed first. This will save you from being stressed about your work.
Trying to earn quick brownie points by making unrealistic commitments and not honouring them does more harm than good. It harms your credibility.
Stop Procrastinating: Putting off or delaying doing things is procrastination. It is an illusion that by putting off things to be done, you are happy. Effectively, you are inviting anxiety and stress because the thought that something is pending is constantly on your mind. You are fooling yourself by saying, it is alright to keep it for later as I still have some more time. The result is that you get overwhelmed and due to the pressure of completion, the quality of your work suffers.
Therefore, the only way to beat procrastination is to change your self-talk (what you tell yourself). Tell yourself, that what must be done, must be done without any delay. Over time, your mind will prompt you to complete what is pending.
The most effective mantra is ‘Do it now’. This can happen only when you change your self-talk!
Become Accountable: The Oxford Dictionary defines accountability as the quality of being accountable; liability to account for and answer for one’s conduct, performance of duties, etc.
In other words, accountability means doing what you said you would do and taking responsibility for the consequences, not blaming others, if things went wrong.
To be known for being accountable, you must first set goals to achieve tasks, prioritize them, and act. It is important to be organized as clutter makes things difficult. Remembering everything may be hard, hence, you can write you’re your commitments or take the help of some digital tools to set reminders. The most important thing to know is the consequences of not doing what you said you would do.
Accountability is a big measure of a person’s reputation in the workplace.
Say “No”: It’s okay to refuse requests that don’t fall in your job domain. Some may not be happy with your answer for the moment, but in the long run, it will help you from being burdened with tasks that should be done by others.
On the other hand, the consequences of saying “Yes” and not doing what you committed to do, are serious and may ruin your reputation.
Saying “No” when it is to be said is one of the most powerful traits. It can be a saviour at times!
Value Relationships: Lasting relationships are built on mutual trust. If commitment is missing, trust will soon be lost. Lack of commitment can affect both professional and personal relationships.
If there is no commitment in a relationship, doubt creeps in, and there is insecurity as the relationship becomes unstable. This may lead to emotional issues and can even cause the relationship to break down completely.
Being open and transparent in relationships helps to make it stronger. Living up to commitments is the glue that binds relationships. Treating all relationships with respect and not differentiating them while making commitments will make you the person who enjoys the trust and respect of all.
Shed Impulsive behaviour: Impulsive behaviour is acting without thinking of the consequences. There are many types of impulsive behaviour, but the most prominent are: committing without commitment as it just helps to get over a situation, buying something without real need for it, to saying something that may not be necessary.
To begin with, every time you feel, you are being impulsive count one to ten before doing anything, this will stop you from being impulsive momentarily. The next step for you is to practice mindfulness and work on self-awareness. Before saying anything or doing anything understand the consequences. Practicing these will help you to control impulsive behaviour.
Deal with unforeseen circumstances: These do not occur every time, hence, if it does happen, make sure you reach out to the persons concerned and apprise them of the facts truthfully. Then complete what you have committed as soon as the situation is under control. People who are committed will exceed their limits to live up to their commitments. People respect honesty and truthfulness; it increases trust and reliability.
Make Commitment your Core value: Values motivate you to behave in a particular way. They are guiding principles that give you direction and cannot be compromised. Core values are deeply rooted in your being. Hence, if commitment becomes your core value, you will do everything to live up to your commitment.
Values a person possesses are very important indicators of the kind of person you are. Understand the importance of being committed and recognize this as your core value, you will see that you will not compromise on commitment anymore. Your integrity and commitment will enhance your credibility to newer heights.
Wait no more, start being committed to your commitments, and achieve success!
